This punky little number was recorded in the band’s Combatant Studios in Ft. Collins, Colorado. I wonder if that’s anywhere near Colorado Springs? I guess I could Google it, but I don’t care that much. I was on a skateboard tour once in Colorado Springs a lifetime ago; that’s where I wrote this little story for my book Skinema:

My ex-girlfriend had big, pierced tits and large tattoos on her backs and loved anal sex. My ex had tattoos on both arms and angel wings covering her entire back, which I find great humor in now, after having learned what an evil cunt she truly is. Aside from having me held at gunpoint in my own house and having the police come and arrest me, she broke my fingers once by slamming them in the door and also stole my car. I suppose if you can ignore that and the numerous suicide attempts and lying and cheating, she was a very sweet girl.

One time I was on tour just outside Denver and we met up with some guys who ran a tattoo shop and they offered to give us free tattoos. They also lined up three girls to come down and put on a little lesbian performance. At the time, things weren’t good between me and my ex. She had just told me she let some guy from across the street fuck her in the ass because she was tired of playing with herself while I was out of town on business. What a classy girl. So I opted to get friendly with the lesbians instead of getting a tattoo. The other guys took full advantage of the tattoo offer. One friend got the outline of California on his arm with his name in it while one of the gals rested her tits on his head. It looked about as cool as getting a quarter tattooed behind your ear. By the time it was my friend, Justin’s, turn we were all fairly liquored-up, including the tattoo artists. Justin wanted two interlocking wedding bands on his inner arm with his grandparents’ initials on each side with the word "Forever" above it and "Together" below it. "Forever together" sounded wrong to me, but who am I to tell someone what to get on their body? The artist sketched it up, we all looked it over and approved it and within half an hour it was done.

That’s when I noticed it. The artist had misspelled the word "together". He wrote it as ‘togoither’. I felt awful. Being a writer, I should have caught the error. My only excuse was that I was wasted with two girls rimming each other on the floor in front of me as a distraction.

I remember taking photos of the typo and fighting to keep myself from laughing. I have a lot of good pictures from that night. There was one of me and one of the girls, the one with the natural 36DDs, where I’m putting a bottle of Budweiser inside her and I’d stuck Budweiser labels to her ass cheeks. I was also wearing a tacky Budweiser Hawaiian shirt. The whole thing reeked of high fashion.

At some point I thought I should buy some new nipple rings for my girlfriend back home so she would shut the fuck up and stop complaining. She had huge, gaudy ones in, up until then, so I got her some cute little ones; she loved them. A few weeks later, she called my cell phone fuming after she saw the photos I ran of the lesbian girls in Big Brother Magazine.

After chastising me for a few minutes, she asked when I had taken the photos. Again, trying to fight back the laughter, I said, “Remember that time you let the neighbor fuck you in the ass and I bought you nipple rings?”