Over the years, my ass has met a lot of different kinds of people and learned a lot of things. It is knowledgeable on a variety of subjects, ranging from Tommy Pistol, to ketchup bottles, to ASStrophysics. Throughout the years, you've spent hours getting to know my ass...but you've never had the chance to really talk to it. It's about time my ass shared some of its intellect with my beloved fans!
So please: SUBMIT A QUESTION to my ass! It will bestow its worldly knowledge upon you all. As you may know, my ass has a very hectic schedule; so don't be offended if it doesn't answer your question right away.
I look forward to hearing from you!
xoxo
Joanna Angel (and her Ass)
To submit a question, please write into advice@burningangel.com.
Questions will be posted WITHOUT names and information. Don't worry - your sexual inquiries are secret safe with us!
*JOANNA'S ASS IS NOT A PROFESSIONAL. IT'S NOT "DR. ASS" or "PROFESSOR ANGEL ASS" or anything like that, so please keep this in mind when submitting questions and - more importantly - receiving answers!
Dear Joanna's Ass,
Ok, I have two questions: 1. What's the biggest cock you've had in your ass? And 2. How did you lose your ass virginity? Like, how big is a viriginity-busting cock? I want to lose mine but I've tried it once and it hurt really bad, so I quit. Thanks Joanna's Ass!
Sincerely,
Tight Ass
Well, I don't know...the longest cock I ever had inside me belonged to Sean Michaels and I think the thickest dick I ever had in me belonged to Manuel Ferrara, although I am not so sure. I don't know the inches or diameter of either, but you can find their penises in lots of places on the Internet. I have had small penises in me that hurt; sometimes when penises are small they tend to just think they can jam themselves right in me. If it really hurt that bad, the guy probably didn't know what he was doing and you may have not been relaxed enough. Maybe you should go to the sex toy store and get an assortment of different-sized dildos, and take an afternoon and have a million-hour masturbate-a-thon and try sticking them in you. Get yourself aroused first, use your favorite lube, light some candles, put on some music...err...maybe some BurningAngel porno too!...and just try to get yourself comfortable with anal sex with yourself before you try it with someone else. I think that is the most responsible thing to do.
Dear Joanna's Ass,
I recently hook up with a new lady, for about 3 months now. Every thing is good, but I wanna make her squirt more. I made her squirt one time when I went down on her and licked her clit, spanked and swirled it, but since then, no more. Is there a special porn move you can tell me about or something?
Your Loyal Fan,
Squirt-a-holic
(ASS): I don't know much about squirting - you will have to ask Joanna's Pussy that question. I will go get it. Hold on.
(PUSSY): Hi! Here I am. Thanks so much for getting in touch with me. No one ever really wants to talk to me; everyone is so obsessed with Joanna's ass, I get lonely sometimes. OK. I will get to the point. Sorry. Anyways, to be honest, squirting doesn't feel THAT good. It's actually kind of annoying sometimes...it sort of feels like someone reached inside you and pulled an orgasm out of you...and it doesn't build up as much as other orgasms do. It's more shocking than anything else. It's fun every once in awhile, just don't try and do it like every time or something. You basically have to curve your finger, put it on an angle and just go really fast and really hard right on the G-spot. You should go watch any of the pornos on BurningAngel with Mr.Pete in it. He can make anyone squirt. Just follow what he does and you should be fine.
(ASS): OK - now go away; you're not needed anymore.
(PUSSY): =( You suck!
Maybe your ass can tell me the answer to this Physiology question? Here it is: Cells in the small intestine absorb the sugars galactose and fructose and the amino acids glycine and serine by some form of carrier-mediated transport. Inhibiting the cells' ability to make ATP inhibits the absorption of galactose and both amino acids. Fructose is still absorbd under these conditions. How is fructose absorbed? Thanks for the help.
Sincerely,
Wise Guy
Well, it's not completely understood, but some evidence suggests active transport, because fructose uptake has been shown to occur against a concentration gradient. However, the majority of research supports the claim that fructose absorption occurs on the mucosal membrane via facilitated transport involving GLUT5 transport proteins. Since the concentration of fructose is higher in the lumen, fructose is able to flow down a concentration gradient into the enterocytes, assisted by transport proteins. Fructose may be transported out of the enterocyte across the basolateral membrane by either GLUT2 or GLUT5, although the GLUT2 transporter has a greater capacity for transporting fructose and therefore the majority of fructose is transported out of the enterocyte through GLUT2...blaaaaaaah...OK, I am totally bored of cutting-and-pasting shit from the Wikipedia and pretending I am a scientist. I'm gonna go take a nap.
Old BA Site!
