Joanna: Hello.

Vinnie: Hey, this is Vinnie from LESS THAN JAKE.

Joanna: Hey! That's pretty fancy that your name on the caller ID comes up as “Less Than Jake”...

Vinnie: It IS pretty fancy. [Joanna laughs]

Joanna: How did you do that? I want my phone to do something fancy like that...my phone always says my real last name. It's embarassing.

Vinnie: It all goes into how it's paid...cause I consider my phone a company phone...

Joanna: Oh, I get it. I understand. Hold on – let me switch phones.

Vinnie: Ok.

Joanna: Ok, I'm back!

Vinnie: How's California?

Joanna: It's fine...weren't you guys here just recently?

Vinnie: Yes – when were there, I decided to take a brief sabbatical off the bus, and get a rental car, and get hotels...

Joanna: Well that sounds kind of fun.

Vinnie: It wasn't “kind of fun” – it was REALLY fun.

Joanna: Did you get, like, a cadillac convertible?

Vinnie: I didn't go THAT far, but I did stay in some really nice hotels, so -

Joanna: Well, that's fun! Anyway – HI! Now I'm really ready -

Vinnie: I just bought a BBQed pork sandwich, and I'm gonna eat it...probably as we do this interview, so I'm excited!

Joanna: That's awesome! I don't care – I'll probably be making coffee while we do the interview, SO we'll both be doing our own things. Ummm, so uh – you have to tell everyone your name...that is the first thing.

Vinnie: My name is Vinnie. And I play drums in LESS THAN JAKE. And I usually am considered the mouthpiece of the band also.

Joanna: So you're like the spokesperson?

Vinnie: I am the spokesperson...I'm a spokesmodel for LESS THAN JAKE.

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: I'm like the spokesmodel for my company, so that works out well. So, anyway – you've been in the band the entire time, right?

Vinnie: Yes.

Joanna: I used to listen to LESS THAN JAKE a lot when I was a little kid.

Vinnie: You're probably in the company of probbaly around 900,000 other people that used to listen to us as they were young kids.

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: I used to listen to you guys a lot. There was a time when I had a hard time listening to anything else other than that album, Pezcore.

Vinnie: I love Pezcore still!

Joanna: Yeah – it was really addictive. But since I'm not a little kid anymore, did you guys break up or anything – in between when I was last listening to you?

Vinnie: Absolutely not. If the last time you listened to us was Pezcore -

Joanna: - well then there was another album after that...the purple one, right?! What was that album called?

Vinnie: The purple one!?!

Joanna: Isn't there an album that had a purple cover?

Vinnie: Ummm...not really. I'll give you the rundown: there was Losing Streak after that...there was Hello Rockview after that...there was Borders & Boundaries after that...there was In with the Out Crowd after that...and then there's this one that just came out a month and a half ago called GNV FLA.

Joanna: Oh, ok. So I'm just missing a very important chunk of LESS THAN JAKE history.

Vinnie: Oh, and I forgot Anthem. You are missing out on some great records.

Joanna: Well, do you think this latest album is your best album?

Vinnie: I think that it ranks up there with our best albums. I think that after 16 years of being in a band, I don't really rank records anymore...I just rank songs as favorites. So some of the songs that are on the new record are some of my favorite songs of LESS THAN JAKE, so I think that speaks volumes about it. I couldn't say that about our last record before this one - In with the Out Crowd, but a lot of people have deemed this one - GNV FLA - our best record.

Joanna: When you guys sing live, do you think that it's a lot of new people, that are just hearing about you now?

Vinnie: Well, here's the thing: we've been together for 16 years, so -

Joanna: That is a long time...

Vinnie: I don't ever assume that – because even if it's their first time coming to listen to us, chances are they've seen our name somewhere...so it's not like anyone who hears us is just hearing of us now.

Joanna: Do a lot of the people who come request old songs and things like that?

Vinnie: Yeah, of course. We play a lot of old songs, we play a lot of new songs, and everything in between...that's the band – we like to kind of give good, sporadic representation of our band's history as we play live. I think that's what you have to do when you've been around this long.

Joanna: Well, I listened to the new record. It was good! So does it make you upset when people say they haven't heard of you guys since, like, one of your earlier albums?

Vinnie: You know, it doesn't, but it reminds me of a story that happened, and I cringed back when the story was happening and I cringe now when I hear people go: “I haven't heard of you in 15 years!” or, actually, when they say: “I liked you when I was a little kid”, like yourself.

Joanna: Well, if it helps, I think you guys were an important part of my childhood – I don't know if I could've done it without you guys.

Vinnie: Well, that's something to be said!

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: What does the new album stand for?

Vinnie: It stands for Gainesville, Florida – where we're from.

Joanna: Don't you have songs about New Jersey too?

Vinnie: I used to live in New Jersey. I lived in New Jersey for the first 15 years that I was alive.

Joanna: Where in New Jersey did you grow up?

Vinnie: I lived in Woodbridge.

Joanna: Oh, you did! So you – did you hang out in New Brunswick? You probably didn't hang out too much, since you were only 15.

Vinnie: My brother is 4 years older than me, and he was heavily into punk rock, so I did – I spent time in New Brunswick. I spent time in Trenton also, which was City Gardens...I was part of the bridge-and-tunnel kids who would go in for matinees at CBGBs on Sundays, you know?

Joanna: Yeah.

Vinnie: I was real lucky to be really young – 12 and 13 – and listening to bands that sort of shaped how I listen to music.

Joanna: Yeah, when I was younger, I thought you guys were a New Jersey band.

Vinnie: Yeah, well because of that, there's a lot of New Jersey references in my music.

Joanna: Do you go back to visit?

Vinnie: Only when I'm on tour really. I mean, if I'm up north, I'd rather go to New York City -

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: Yeah...than go hang out in New Jersey! So you guys have been a band for 16 years...you guys are, like, classic rock bands in the punk world!

Vinnie: You know what weirds me out about that, is that we got grandfathered in 'cause we've been around for so long, you know? -

Joanna: Umhmm.

Vinnie: - so you start to have people that are influenced by your band, and it starts to be a tad bit of a freak-out. You know? Or when people describe genres and -

Joanna: Yeah, I understand.

Vinnie: And never when I was 13 or 14, would I have ever considered that I'd be a grown man who traveled in a punk rock band, and that's what I would make a living off of...it's a mind-blower, man. If the 13-year-old me could meet the me now, we'd be high-fiving!

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: I think that sometimes. And, like, have you guys – throughout the years – you're not on a major label, are you?

Vinnie: We have been, but this last record, we released ourselves under Sleep It Off records.

Joanna: Are you only going to release your own records, or are you going to look for other bands and release their records too?

Vinnie: You know, people have asked that...right now, it's just going to be LESS THAN JAKE, but I'm not opposed to looking for other bands either...I have another label, so I put out other bands on that label, so it's just a matter of if there's a band that comes around that all five of us like.

Joanna: Do you think, if you were going to give advice to younger bands, would you say it's smarter now – with the Internet and everything – is it smarter now to put albums out yourselves? Or should people still be making demos and sending them in places?

Vinnie: Well, you know, you've opened up a can of worms, that I've talked a lot about, so I can ramble on, but I'll sum it up...

[Joanna giggles]

Vinnie: Basically, getting distribution being a small band or a small label, is somewhat easy – ok, let me just scratch that, cause I'm trying to encapsule it and I can't, so fuck it – I'm just going to ramble for five minutes!

Joanna: Ok, 1-2-3 go!

Vinnie: If you're a young band, it's easy enough to get distribution as it would be to get signed to another label. If you have the money, there's no reason to not do it yourself, due to the Internet. It's easy for people to get instant access and instant information about the bands that they like with the Internet. So with that said, why go to someone who's going to take 80% of your money? So, if a band wants to be a career band, I think that the way to go is doing it yourselves. It's much easier to do it yourself now, 'cause all the tools are there for you. But, with that said, if there's no one in your band who's business-inclined, then doing your own record: not so smart.

Joanna: That makes sense. It happens that way in the porn industry as well. If you put it out yourself, you have this lovely piece of porn that you can sell forever, rather than just getting a one-time fee.

[Vinne laughs]

Joanna: I have so many lovely pieces of porn that I can sell...forever. They will live forever!

[Both laugh]

Vinnie: Exactly – you're stoked!

Joanna: I am...it's really great. So did your PR people tell you that you were being interviewed on a porn website this morning?

Vinnie: You know, I know the site by name, so -

Joanna: Oh, you do!?! How did you hear of it?

Vinnie: You know, when boys are on tour...boys like pornography.

[Joanna laughs]

Vinnie: It's no big mystery or anything – it's, like, naked girls, and dudes like naked girls, and punk rock guys like punk rock girls...so...a friend of mine was a member of Suicide Girls for a long time, but then, I guess...BurningAngel is better, so...

Joanna: [Laughs] Umm, speaking of porn and naked girls...since you guys have been a band for so long, do you have any stories involving girls from tour or anything like that?

Vinnie: Ok, I'm gonna tell you a story...SO: we're on a tour, and I come back to the bus and everyone is in this fuckin' fury; they're, like, scattering around and there's this thing in the air, and I'm like, “What the hell are you guys doing?” and one of the band members comes up to me and he's like, “We talked this girl into shaving her and her friends in the back lounge...” and so I'm like, “Oh really? You talked some girls into that!”...like that's weird!

Joanna: [Laughs] Shaving?

Vinnie: So, I guess our sound guy was talking to these girls outsie, and some of them said “Well yeah, I have this landing strip”...and then one of 'em said, “Well, I want to be this woman, and I have this full bush between my legs,” and so our sound guy talked these girls into shaving it all off in the back, and apparently everyone was frantically trying to find a razor.

[Joanna laughs]

Vinnie: And they were all giddy like schoolgirls because this was going to happen. And so they found the razor -

Joanna: - they found the razor?

Vinnie: They found the razor, and they did their bit, and they have it on video...

Joanna: Who instigated this? The sound guy?

Vinnie: The sound guy, yeah.

Joanna: Every band I interview – it's always the sound guy or the roadie or the merch guy who instigates these things...why is that?

Vinnie: They have the most time in a day.

Joanna: Oh really? Is that it? Yeah – all the bands' stories always involve some guy who's not in the band, mixing it up...

Vinnie: Well, every merch guy that we've ever had has been a dirty fuckin' son of a bitch.

[Joanna laughs]

Vinnie: Seriously, because those guys are hanging out behind a merch booth. People are coming up, and they're like, “Oh, hang out, let's talk!” Those guys have the entire day and night to talk to people, so like, by the end of the night, they can do whatever they do.

Joanna: So it doesn't really pay to be a rock star...it just pays to sell t-shirts for rock stars?

Vinnie: Or, it pays to have a merch guy that's really good at picking up a lot of chicks!

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: Well, that's good to know! So, when you do – or if you do – watch porn, would you rather watch porn with punk rock girls, or would you rather watch, like, a blond with fake boobs?

Vinnie: I'd rather watch a girl that is out of the norm of what porn usually is. If I was going to put my finger on the type of girl in pornography, that's already a porn star – it would be Stoya. Punk rock looking, but not tattooed, but, like, the look to it.

Joanna: Yeah, I understand. I made out with her in a bathroom once. And an elevator!

Vinnie: That's good stuff! Again, I have been in a puink rock band for-eeeever, so you want to see a girl who has sleeves and septum piercings. I'm not a big fan of a lot of blond hair and a lot of weird 80s look...it's a weird turnoff for me.

Joanna: What about plastic surgery?

Vinnie: I'm not into that at all. It has to be natural. You want a naked girl to be natural.

Joanna: So, a few more questions...I had a little advice column on BurningAngel, and it's called “ASSk Joanna” with two S's...so it's an advice column where people submit questions to my ass...do you want to submit a question?

Vinnie: Submit a question to your ass?

Joanna: [Laughs] Yeah...

Vinnie: Ok, ummm, well I would ask this: if you're wearing a thong, do you really ever get used to the string that is in your ass crack!?!

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: You know, you get so used to it, that it starts to get uncomfortable when something is covering your ass. Regular underwear feels strange. Like I was flying the other day, and I thought “I don't want to wear a thong on an airplane,” so I put panties on, but it felt strange.

Vinnie: That's funny because I flew the other day too, but I decided to wear a thong, and -

[Joanna laughs...a lot]

Joanna: So, there's a lot of people reading this interview right now, and it's on BurningAngel, and BurningAngel has a lot of porn on it, with band interviews and record reviews and stuff like that, SO...you know, chances are they're about to watch a porn, or just finished watching a porn, or maybe magically they only came to this site to read this interview, and they're never going to look at a porn -

Vinnie: That is highly unlikely...

[Joanna laughs]

Joanna: But...is there anything you want to say to these people?

Vinnie: Just clean up, man! I've had so many roommates over the years, and so many encounters with guys on the bus, and -

Joanna: It's messy -

Vinnie: It's not only that, man – if you're going to masturbate, clean up! Don't leave your little smock around, or your crusty towel around. Take 15 seconds to clean up after you watch porn, and touch yourself in ugly ways. You know, it's common sense to me.

Joanna: You know, some people are proud I guess.

Vinnie: Proud of this weird towel that's crunchy? Throw it in the fuckin' laundry!

Joanna: One of the most wonderful things about BurningAngel is that about 40% of our subscribers are women, and women don't leave that much of a mess.

Vinnie: That's true. That's good.

Joanna: The mess is not as sticky.

Vinnie: Unless she squirts. That is the scariest thing that happened to me...when a girl squirted. It was like when you go to a haunted house and something jumps out at you. It was scary. [Joanna laughs]

Joanna: You should take it as a compliment.

Vinnie: In retrospect it's cool, but at the time, it was scary.

Joanna: Well, thank you for taking the time to do the interview. Have a lovely day and enjoy...everything!

Vinnie: Right on!