My friend’s last name is Tim Tim. I like when words repeat themselves. It’s funny. Like you have a speech impediment. The other day, I was speaking to to Tim Tim and he told told me how his mom mom was a gangbanger (not like Joanna...the other kind) back in the '70s, and one day they were driving down the highway in LA and her friend driving the lowrider in front of her accidentally hit the switches to make the car do that bouncy-bounce thing and the car bottomed out at 65mph and a spark shot into the gas tank and the car exploded and everyone inside was incinerated. Crazy, right? The press release for this album said these guys just put out an album in June. WTF? What are they trying to prove? Are they going to make an album every other month? It’s not a race, guys. The press release also says that their June album had a cover of Black Flag’s "Wasted". The other day a gay Black Flag cover band called "Black Fag" Myspaced me. They took the Black Flag logo and colored it in rainbow. And they did the most awesomely gay, lispy cover of "Wasted". It basically made my week. I wonder if Heavy Heavy Low Low’s version was anywhere as awesome...

OH SHIT! Their version is on this disc too. That’s weird.

Wait. Their whole June album is on this disc too. This is confusing. This is precisely the reason I do not read press releases. I wonder who the guy on the far right is in their press photo. He’s real short. I bet he’s the drummer. Drummers are always short.

That little guy on the end really makes me like this band. And this CD. Buy it.

—Chris Nieratko

Ps. I always thought the term "Toxic Shock" had a nice ring to it. You’d think doctors would have named the condition something a little less cool-sounding. Because, I don’t know about you, but I’d be pretty psyched on telling people, “Yeah, so, you know…I got toxic shock. It’s cool. Whatever.”

More stupid can be found at Chrisnieratko.com.