Some people call it a blessing, having many talents, abilities, hobbies...whatever you wish to call it.  I say it's a curse.  Having ambitions that pull you in so many different directions can be both confusing, and tiring.  Some of my talents that I actively practice at the moment, take most of the time away from my core direction I was heading toward in the first place, mainly because...lets face it...money comes first.

My jewelry store occupies most of my attention, wheather it be spending hours on new designs, editing photos, listin them on the site.  It sometimes can take up all of my day.  Then there's promoting, which entails blogging, spamming :P whatever, shows/events, sometimes talking with other stores about consignments...Then there's this new porn site I got involved with :P I spend a lot of time trying to keep in touch with people, and now I do my best to make time for camming.  Then there's my wine/spirits tasting gig, where I recieve the product to demo and sample out, research it, design a setup for the upcoming tasting, host the tasting, then fax out the info from the event.

I'm bringing all this up because I've recently got kind of a wakeup call from a good friend.  My husband went to get tattooed at our local shop, and his artist, who's taught me a considerable amount about tattooing, and drawing, asked me if I was still practicing...embarassed, I said no, and explained to him why.  So he asks me, what do you want to do for the rest of your life...I paused for a second, and said, "What DON'T I want to do?"  I realized how that sounded, and finally responded with "I want to rock out with my cock out...forever."  which he knew meant  wanted to make music for the rest of my life, but we have always played around with the idea of me apprenticing.  He told me, "You need to be dedicated."  I feel that I'm dedicated to many things right now, just my priorities have been shifted lately toward whatever ability I have that makes me the most money, so music and drawing weren't, and they were pushed to the side.

Someday, I will figure out how I can mesh all my passions together into one job, or at least put myself in a position that will allow me to freely decide what I want to do forever.  It sounds like a fantasy to most people, but I think in due time I can make it happen.  There's always time for change, so I'm going to start thinking about a good new year's resolution for the BA party this year, I can't wait!  I hope a lot of you will be there!